If I see another segment on the Today Show about moms — today was “Alpha Moms” — I’m going in to get my tubes tied. (I guess I’d better schedule that for Monday, because Today runs a segment every single day without fail.) This woman actually talked about the synergy of Alpha and Mom.

That’s it. I just can’t take it. Synergy? I’m feeling a sudden synergy. It’s the same synergy I sense when I see kids throwing french fries in restaurants (best to just go somewhere classier) or hear babies screaming at the grocery store. It’s a synergy between my brain and my ovaries, with the former shutting down the latter. But there’s another synergy — finger to remote control, changing the channel to get far, far away from the Today Show.